Friday, March 11, 2011

Getting Older - Midlife Crisis?


Since I was a kid I have always laughed at the concept of mid-life crisis because of something that I saw. 
I have a very vivid image in my mind of a man that my parents barely knew in a "kid" car.  His head was bald and he was acting like a crazy teenager.  When I inquired about his behavior my Mother told me the man was having a midlife crisis.


With each passing birthday my Mother asks me, "so how does it feel."  And my reply is always, "fine."

But, lately as I have approached this birthday, I have been thinking about what this midlife crisis business means to me.  For me it's not about the car I won't drive or the the entertainment I might have missed while raising my family or the social stature that one might desire to obtain. 

For me it's watching my last little one as he runs, putting the effort of a super hero into his gate.  Knowing that as I drink him in, he is my last child.  For me it is watching my grade school kids minds quicken and their capacities grow.  They are not little anymore Mom.  For me it is watching my teens dress up for a dance while knowing this time will not last.  These days pass so quickly as I watch my college student blaze new trails.  And this Fall, Mission papers...

It has not really felt like a crisis to me.  But, I do feel something that I have so thoroughly loved slipping away. 

I take comfort in the the words of those who are 10 or so years older than me.  I have heard them say that being a grandparent is so much fun.  I'll have to take their word for it.  It's a ways off for me right now.

I am so thankful for my chance to be a Mom.  My husband and I have enjoyed our journey so much.  We relish the passing days knowing that before you know it the kids will begin to leave as quickly as they came.  (Not to say that some may not come back from time to time.)

You know, all in all stepping over the threshold into middle age looks alright to me.
It's stepping into the unknown, but that is nothing new.  Each year of our lives has been a step into the darkness and the unknown.  I trust my Father in Heaven to be there to help me face and enjoy what ever may come, just as he has always done.

Midlife crisis?  No.  Not really.  It's just more life to live.  More faith to cultivate.
I can do this.  I am not alone.  I know that I am not alone.  My Heavenly Father has never left me alone.

Why would he start now?

4 comments:

  1. Right there with ya. I do find however, that I enjoy each stage of my childrens lives as much, if not more than, those they have past. This leads me to believe all those grandparent stories are true. :)

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  2. You articulated my feelings exactly. :)

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  3. I never understood about people's midlife crises, but it's only people who have unfulfilled lives that have those. (Like that bald guy with the kid car.)

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  4. Lovely post. I turned 44 last week and have kids from 19 to 2. I know big stretch. The two year old has saved me from missing little ones around. I guess by the time she is grown there will be grandkids.

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